How dare you help Dad?!

Face it, dads. We can't win.

A new report out by LiveScience suggests that fathers who help out at home and try to aid the supermom (who works outside the home in addition to being a mother) could be hurting mom's self-esteem. Cue cheesy soap opera organ music!

I could offer an elaborate explanation of my opinion, but I'll keep it short. I'm pissed. So many women would love their husbands to help out more at home, and husbands should. If for nothing else, to show the moms that they love them and want to make things easier. But putting guys into this lose-lose scenario (either you help and you hurt mom's ego or you don't help and look like a jerk) is ridiculous and cruel. Guys, when you help out, you're a hero. Science can kiss your butt.

Infomercials and Idiots

We've all seen the late-night infomercials offering weird and obscure products that no self-respecting person should be without, like the Snuggie, the Ab Circle and the Shark Navigator Vacuum Cleaner. More often than not these items end up being coat racks that no self-respecting person should be without, but I digress. Part of me wants to get some friends together and see if we could recreate one of these commercials, complete with bad acting, cheesy voiceovers and, of course, screwy gadgets that you will use about as often as a steel-wool shower backbrush.

I have so many questions regarding these TV spots. Who directs them? Who develops the products that appear in them? How big is the market for said products? How much does it cost to make them and what profit do you clear? If I knew more about that, I might make a go of it myself.

I once had an invention idea for keeping your sheets locked down at night so your spouse couldn't steal the covers. Had the prototype up and everything. Then my dreams were crushed by someone close to me. I haven't been the same since. However, after seeing some of these commercials, I should probably give that person a handshake and hug.

Biting off too much

I need to do better about realizing my limits.

So, I'm running the half marathon this year. That' right; 13.1 miles is waiting for me on April 24, and I'd love to finish in less than 2 hours. I'm training four days a week. But there's more.

I'm also participating in the Dale Carnegie course, which teaches you leadership and public speaking skills. That takes until 9:30 Tuesday nights for the past (and next) 6 weeks. But there's more.

I've been trying to read more books about leadership in 2010. I want to develop more in that capacity, even though there is seemingly no reason on the horizon. But there's more.

My wife and I are leaders in one of those engaged couple's weekend retreats in August, and we meet regularly with the other couples at our church for that. But there's more.

I also get some freelance proofreading assignments sent to me by a local travel magazine. It's something I try to do when I can for a little walking-around money. But there's more.

I'm a weird guy; one of those yahoos who likes to get home from work and spend time with his wife and son. While this priority is last on this list, it's first in my life. I've been arranging everything around it.

I've over-committed myself, and there has been many a night when I've gotten home wondering why I do it, and what can I learn. So what have I learned? My own limits.

I can't say there's one thing to cut out that will make my life more manageable. But I have learned to sense when I'm getting burned out and then ask 'How did you let yourself get into this? Who or what could you have simply said "no" to that would have made this better?'

Being able to say no lightens your load. Noting how tired you get serves as a great reminder to recognize your own limits and not overextend yourself in an attempt to satisfy everyone. Try to be everything to everybody and you end up being nothing for nobody. Learn your limits and have your happiness.

Spreading the love (well, not really)

In an ode to my brothers and sisters in Christ, I pull from Matthew 5:11-12. "Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."

My wife was shocked at this and emailed the link to me. Seems a Baptist preacher at the Connor Heights Baptist Church (don't worry, I'm not calling out the entire Baptist denomination, just this guy in particular) in Pigeon Forge, TN is distributing pamphlets to anyone who will take them claiming that the Roman Catholic Church is not Christian, and communion comes from the devil.

That church's preacher, Jonathan Hatcher, according to the news report, says the pamphlets are meant to help spread the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Can you feel the love?

I've been to some Catholic services in my time, and can honestly say there is no shortage of praising God and Jesus. It is because of my faith in their boundless love and mercy that I make this statement of fact. Catholics are indeed Christian, and God condemns none of us and loves all people equally. How could He not ... we are His children. But even that is not what puzzles me.

It just seems to me that if you want to bring people closer to God, to teach them to love Jesus, to become a more faithful follower ... you wouldn't use fear as a motivator. The peace and love of Christ is enough to soften even the hardest of human hearts, so spreading that message should be the point of any ministry, not dogging your Christian neighbors. You shouldn't have to proclaim that the fires of hell are bad. Any dickweed knows that.

God wants to have a personal relationship with you. He cares about YOU. As does Jesus, and He really is the way, the truth and the life. They have good things in store for you, so don't shy away from them. That's my testimony. If you'd like to learn more, check out a church where you can grow closer to them. They are around every corner ... except one in Pigeon Forge.

The most arrogant aspect of John Edwards

He's been out of the news for a couple of weeks, and that's fine by me. But at breakfast this morning I thought about John Edwards, and an incredible urge to string him up from the goalpost by his mini-sized jock strap came over me. There are plenty of reasons, but one really stands out. Not the cheating, not the cheating on the wife with cancer, not the lying about it or being a horrible example to his kids (each of which would require a lot more than a string-up as punishment).

I watched the Dateline episode a few weeks ago (or whatever news program it was) where they profiled his ex-aide, Andrew Young. In a taped phone conversation where Edwards was trying to convince Young to claim paternity over the Edwards/Rielle Hunter child, Edwards was quoted as telling Young "The fate of the free world is in your hands."

Gimme a W! Gimme a T! Gimme an F! Whatcha got? EDWARDS!

This guy wasn't president. He wasn't vice president. He wasn't even his party's nominee to BE president! Yet he has the arrogance (even if the expression was made out of fear of being exposed) to tell his aide that the world is going to take a nose dive to hell if Young doesn't cover JE's backside.

I hope the ensuing crapstorm for Edwards humbles him enough to start thinking about others. Umbrellas out!

Great lesson learned

I heard a very profound piece of ministry yesterday. And it was AFTER I got out of devotional.

It's hard to forgive yourself sometimes. You are the one who must live with the emotional consequences of your actions, even if it was someone one else who was hurt by them. But after speaking with a friend of mine about that subject, I have a new perspective.

She told me of Jesus' words in John 20:23. "If you forgive people's sins, they are forgiven. If you retain people's sins, they are retained." I was too thick to fully understand what that meant, so she broke it down for me. I am a person. I'm in that group that God says to forgive, and if I don't forgive myself, that irritates Him.

If you're in the backyard with God throwing the football, and you drop a pass from Him, you have to get over that so you can get back to enjoying your time with God. He'll wait for you to quit kicking yourself, but get over the dropped pass. The only one more eager than you to do that is the Man Himself!

Valentine's Day

Something about Valentine's Day has puzzled me since I was old enough to know what the flip it was.

Sure, I get that prices are jacked up beyond belief (a rose on Feb. 14 costs as much as a bouquet of them did 4 weeks earlier). There's that whole stereotypical thing of how your girlfriend/wife says not to get her anything, then she gives you the cold shoulder for not getting her anything. But that's not what puzzles me.

My question is: When it's a well-known fact that the lines at most restaurants will be a mile long, why does everyone still insist on going out to dinner? If you went to eat out at 5:30 and were told the wait is 2 hours (and that's WITH a reservation and a $20 tip to the host), would you still go out? Of course not!

I say have a night in. Buy some groceries and spend the evening with your other half cooking your favorite dinner. That, in and of itself, is a bonding experience. And it's a heckuva lot easier than standing around waiting for someone to yell your name to say that the table's ready.